rebecca

If I Came With Product Warnings

By: Rebecca LaFortune


I wonder what it’d be life

if I came with product warnings.


Caution:

Sarcasm is abundant.


Do not ingest.

That is cannibalism, you sicko.


Do not set aflame.

Will most likely kill her.


Keep away from stupid people.

The mockery will never stop.


If not fed,

Don’t be surprised if you lose a limb.


Yeah,

I should probably come with instructions, too.